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This past Saturday my son split his gorgeous little head open when he fell on a box containing some sort of stereo equipment that looked like a hard drive tower. It was very hard plastic and had very sharp edges. Chaos ensued.
As a rule I have never made an issue of injury. Literally I have told people that unless there is blood I don’t worry. I just kiss his “boo boo” and tell him he’s fine. He doesn’t freak out and has learned what needs a kiss, what needs a kiss and a hug, and what doesn’t need anything at all. He’s a tough little nut. this was not one of those cases.
the sound was horrifying. the scream blood-curdling. and the image reminded me of that vision in The Shining when the blood is running down the elevator doors. yeah. there was a hole in his head. a HOLE.
chaos. my husband scooped him up and ran to the kitchen where there was better light, my MIL ran for a paper towel and tried to apply it to the wound, I hollered for her to get a wet cloth (probably not very nicely I might add and I should maybe apologize for that), my FIL was getting irritated because he was trying to understand what happened. the boy was still screaming crying and at this point gasping for air. serious chaos.
I am not sure why but when it involves my kid I have the clearest head in a crisis. the husband panics and doesn’t know which way is up. and I know this is just because he is getting ahead of himself and thinking too much about what needs to be done but that doesn’t help us. and then he gets mad because he can’t fix it instantly. that doesn’t help either
3 hours later we were finally in trauma room 1 and they were trying to give my kid an IV which I had been fairly adamant about them NOT doing. it wasn’t until my poor little boy screamed out “mama stahh (stop)” did they decide it wasn’t working. part of me wanted to hurt them as bad as they hurt my baby but I knew that wouldn’t solve anything.
“we’ll give a minute to calm down and we may have to try again on the other side” ACTUALLY NO YOU WON’T. they walked a little faster out of the room at that point.
they gave him “Special K”. Ketamine. it can make them hallucinate and grasp at objects that aren’t there and possibly cry out or babble. it gives them almost an out of body experience. not quite. in fact what it does is make them look lifeless. I never want to see my son looking like that again. I have had nightmares and day-mares and just horrible images popping up in my brain ever since. and then it took an hour and a half to get him to wake up after not the 15 minutes like she promised. how much of that shit did you give him?
I had to prop his non-injured eye lid open and pinch him all over his body trying to stimulate a nervous response all the while calling his name for a good 30 minutes before getting anything. when his eye finally dilated I knew he was coming around but it was excruciating. and they had wanted to give him another IV. GET AWAY FROM MY SON.
can you call an ambulance yourself to transport your kid to another hospital because you’ve lost faith in the people running the one you’re at? is that possible? cause that is what I wanted to do. and several parameds came through I wanted to just throw him on the stretcher and say take him here NOW!
so baby had his first set of stitches. and I say first because if he’s anything like his father they won’t be the last. and it was traumatic for everyone.
its a good thing I see the doctor myself on Thursday because I think I may need to start some blood pressure medication.
…work is a swear word.
…music is played frequently and loudly.
…there are moments of uncontrollable giggling.
…there is random dancing.
…there is always time for Phineas & Ferb.
…there is a dog whose mortal enemy is a garbage truck.
…there are cats on laps.
…there are stories that are read with bad British accents.
…there are arguments over stupid things that always end in laughter.
…there are really good books.
…there is good food.
…there are great friends who know exactly how to make me smile.
…there are dogs that snore.
…there is always a project on the go.
…there are moments of pure hysteria.
…there is a boy who makes everything so much more fun…
Welcome to my world.
when your glasses match!
It literally took my breath away when I took the jacket off and discovered this gorgeous white cover. seriously, I am such a nerd!
ps.the first two were EXCELLENT! and I have enjoyed them immensely.
pps. the first two were The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo & The Girl Who Played With Fire
I love words.
written or spoken.
and it bothers me immensely when people mispronounce words. Or rather they have learned to pronounce them differently and therefore are wrong!
people emphasizing the wrong syllables drive me nuts!
I have always been this way and from the day I found out I was pregnant I was determined that my child would love words as well and would learn to read at an early age. of course what did I know?
the boy was 4 months old (almost 5 months) when he stopped cooing and gooing and making any noise whatsoever. he also had his first ear infection at that time. it took a while but I came to realize this was no coincidence and it was down hill from there.
he growled and grunted for about five or six months and then started making this nasally noise that didn’t correspond with anything.
we had his hearing checked. They said he was fine.
I started seriously teaching him sign at about 12 months or so he finally started using it after about a month. He was doing really well. Really well. and I was proud of him. but it still made me sad.
he didn’t talk.
what was I doing wrong? of course it wasn’t anything I was doing wrong and I know this but I still felt horrible. you just wait until he does talk people would say, then you’ll be wishing he hadn’t started. their kids talked at a “normal” age. they don’t know what it’s like.
we started speech therapy when he was about 18 months old. he was tested to be at a pre-12 month age for speech. at first they put us in a program that was geared towards late talkers. it wasn’t what he needed. the therapists all figured that because of his understanding and ability to follow simple and complex instructions that we just needed a little guidance. it wasn’t what he needed.
he started saying mama and it had purpose. he was over 2. I was over the moon.
they put us into a one-on-one therapy and he would see the therapist every other week. he was very set in his ways and the therapist had a hard time getting him to focus. they started throwing around words like autism and motor planning.
we had him tested for autism. he doesn’t have it.
motor planning is harder to figure out and for a while now we’ve just gone with the approach that this is what he has and how we work with it. basically we have to teach him from the beginning how to use his facial muscles to build sounds.
things that normally wouldn’t bother him started too make him cringe. he would cover his ears with more frequency. and get frustrated and yell.
the speech therapist started demanding more and more from him and we started going weekly. it got to be too much for him and he had a meltdown. I felt awful.
nothing was working.
and then one day about 2.5 months after the surgery something clicked. he started trying. and trying some more. he started paying attention to try to figure it out and not just because I was making him. we had turned a corner. and it felt wonderful.
my wonderfully bright and energetic three year old boy who has the vocabulary of a 12 month old finally gets it and is trying. I have never been so proud in my life. it feels like we’ve finally reached the summit of the mountain and we can just enjoy the view for a while because HE GETS IT. I can’t imagine that everything will just fall into place from this point but it is certainly on its way.
and for all of you who say “just wait until he starts then you’re going to regret wishing for it” I can’t begin to describe how VERY WRONG all of you are. hearing my boy finally find his voice is the best thing on the planet.
and now I love words even more.
and just so you know that’s sarcasm.
I was running out to pick up the usual stuff* and I had left a pot cooking on the stove intentionally cooking. the husband hollers out the window asking if I wanted him to turn it off. I said no. I SAID NO! silly me I was under the impression he understood English. maybe next time I’ll say the opposite of what I really want and see what happens.
if you need me, I’ll be in the kitchen tending over this pot of molasses and bacon beans for the next three hours.
if you need my husband, he’s in the dog house.
*pet food and diapers. how is it we always manage to run out of both at the same time all of the time I don’t know but such is our luck. also it is almost guaranteed that either the food or the diapers will go on sale the day after we buy it.
today is one of those days.
oh it started out okay.
the husband had an appointment and i had made previous arrangements to take him to said appointment. i would return to work later in the morning.
his appointment was pushed back.
no sense in going to work for an hour just to leave and drive over an hour to bring him to his appointment then go back to work. i informed my boss i wouldn’t be in until later than expected due to the change and that was that.
it was already after 1 by the time we got home so i decided to stay home and have lunch before going to work. no big deal right? i’m only going to get a couple hours in anyhow right?
missed a call from the boss.
then received a text asking me to call.
that’s never a good sign.
“what’s going on?”
i will always regret asking that. ALWAYS.
“what was going on” was that our entire week was just turned upside down and gone to hell. or should i say my entire week.
suddenly i have to become a miracle worker and perform them in a very short time frame. and oh yeah, any plans i had for the next day well those are cancelled also because my life is not important.
i don’t get paid enough for this crap.
lesson for the day: don’t piss of Monday. it will chew you up, spit you out and then kick your ass.
if you need me i’ll be at work for the rest of my life.
I was listening to my music while working through my crap day when one of my favourite songs came in to the mix. it made me feel better and i thought i’d share.
cause this guy was having a crap day also but the rhythm is so soothing.
So today while perusing the various news stories the interwebz has to offer I came across this gem about another book into movie franchise coming to fruition. Well actually this was the original story I read but I have a tendency to Google things to double check info.
THE GUNSLINGER INTO A MOVIE????
How excited am I???? You have no idea. Normally I can’t stand to watch Stephen King movies because the books are always so much better, not to mention I detest horror films but this series is something else. It’s like long lost family to me. It took me several years to read the entire series due to work, school, and life in general but when I came back to it I finished it with a vengeance. I kind of feel bad about not reading the whole series together but when I did get back to it and picked up book 5 it was like I hadn’t lost a day. I read 5, 6 and 7 so fast I actually had to reread a few chapters because I felt like I may have missed something. And despite my hesitancy about SK’s books into film (not that they aren’t good, just not my thing) I can see Ron Howard creating something great. Because he is great. And he makes great films. And therefore it has to work. it just HAS TO. because if it doesn’t I might loose some faith in RH and I don’t want to do that. I wouldn’t lose faith in SK. He has been part of my life since I read The TommyKnocker’s when I was 12 and it scared the shit out of me. seriously. But I had to have more and I have been reading his work ever since. I’ve even reread that book several times and it still creeps me out but I think its because I see it through my 12-year-old self. So here I sit excited and anxious and wondering if I will be able to get up the nerve to go see it in a theatre instead of waiting for it to come out on DVD so I can watch it during the day with all the lights on. I’ll let you know when the time comes.
Also on the internets this week are constant reminders that my favourite season is upon us.
I love fall.
I love going apple picking on crisp days.
I love watching as the woods surrounding our house turn from lush to gold and crimson.
I love the smell and look of fields of pumpkins waiting to be turned into jack’o’lanterns.
I love having to start layering clothes so that I can stay toasty warm but my nose and cheeks get rosy.
I also love Halloween.
I found this craft site while searching out some ideas for trick-or-treating this year. Not that anything could possibly tear me away from carving up a few punkins and roasting their innerds but these pumpkin jars have definitely hit my LOVE button. I am currently scavenging my house in search of some jars to desecrate with orange paint.
Its been a few days and looking back on the boy’s birthday hasn’t made it less impossible to believe.
To believe that time continues to speed by despite me pressing harder and harder on the brakes…
To believe the boy is now three…
To believe I could get so upset over weather and cancellations…
To believe in the end it would be my own birthday boy who would be missing the party…
The day didn’t start well. We had large black clouds and wind, really strong wind.
We had a feverish and pukey birthday boy.
I had no clear idea how many people were actually going to show up. and my brain wouldn’t stop. Did I have enough food? Did I have too much food? Will the kids get along? Will the adults get along? Will the entertainment show up? Will it be worth the cost?
I don’t like hosting parties. I will freely admit this now
I am extremely thankful we have such gracious friends and family that, despite Murphy’s Law working against me as usual, just went with it. We had a good day and there were no tears…well no tears from anyone besides me. At some point before the boy turns 4 I will get over the fact he is 3. I promise.
Also the boy will be getting a belated birthday present. I forgot all about this prefab character block that I had been holding on to forever and despite him LOVING Cars right now I thought I had better do something with it before he outgrows it.
This will be the front….
And this will be the back…
I wanted to finish it yesterday but the way this weekend has gone I’ll be happy to have finished it by the end of the week.
I finally started working on a new quilt top last night. It’s been so long seriously like at least three weeks now that I almost forgot how to use my rulers. okay, there’s my straight edge, now I need to do what to get a 5″ square again? wait, it needs to go the other way. Crap I need to be left handed to do this. I am quite ambidextrous normally and even though I am primarily right handed I do so much with my left hand that I should be able to use a rotary cutter right? umm, no, not so much! The lines tend to come out all squigley and crooked and veering off to the left. its not pretty. And the cutting of the pieces is so not my favourite part of the process. partly because I loathe having to do repetitive things and partly because I hate to cut up really pretty fabrics even if I tend to mash them together into something incredible. not that everything I make is incredible but hey I am still learning!
Someday I will be making incredible stuff like Aneela of comfortstitching or Jeni of In Color Order. I just love their work. There are a tonne more that I could list but seriously it would take all day and then I wouldn’t get any work done and you might get bored so lets just move on. Maybe I will start posting a new favourite with each blog. That could be fun!
Anyhow back my new quilt-top-in-progress. I had all these purple and purple accented sheets to work with so I started cutting up blocks and this is what I’ve come up with so far. I took the pictures with the squares well square but I am thinking I might turn them so they are diamonds on the quilt. I only have two done so far but its because I was mostly cutting last night and not piecing.
Trying to think of a blog title totally reminded me of this song by The Black Ghosts. Love it, love them, enjoy. (my favourite part is about 1:48 LOL)